Courts do not yet have a firm grasp of what a trademark for a literary character would mean. The current rules are intellectually dishonest and do not make sense. Literary characters should be eligible to serve as a trademark as soon as a book is published, without the need to “acquire” secondary meaning. The number of literary characters protected by trademark law would be initially increased following the adoption of this principle, with the field soon tapering off. The real effect of an immediate trademark status for literary characters would be to extend protections to valuable characters from their inception and allow courts to focus on the correct application of trademark law.